In a perfect blogging world, I suppose one wouldn't dedicate an entire post to themselves, but I've never claimed to be perfect and so here it goes anyway.
Today is my last day in my 20's -- tomorrow I turn the big 3 0. And yes, I know, "you're only as old as you feel," but honestly that doesn't help. I'm still not sure I like the way 30 sounds. I don't feel old and in fact it wasn't until recently that I realized I could no longer pass as a high school student -- talk about shocker! I had an extremely hard time turning 20. I never wanted to leave my teens because they were wonderful to me. I really had a lot of anxiety leading up to turning 20 because I just knew it was going to be a rotten year and come to find out, I was right. Thankfully after I turned 21, life seemed to come around again and all was well. Turning 30 isn't the same though. I'm not having anxiety toward it, I just really never imagined myself being in my 30's -- it always sounded so old. But, here I am on the brink of it and whether I like it or not, tomorrow is going to come and I am going to turn 30 years old. So, in light of turning 30 in a matter of hours, I've racked my brain with as many things as I could think of about why being in my 30's will be great (let's see if I can convince myself).
- All of my child bearing years are over and I can now work on my "body for life."
- I can run 6+ miles, which I wouldn't have dreamed of doing at 21.
- All of my children will enter school.
- I'll return to a profession that I love (other than motherhood), being an elementary teacher.
- Mac will turn 16 years old and get his driver's license (I can't decide if that is something to look forward to).
- All three of my boys should be holding the priesthood.
- I might actually be able to find some quiet time for myself.
- I shouldn't have to sweep the floor three times a day.
- The three trees we planted in our yard yesterday will be big enough to offer us some shade.
- Unlike in my 20's, I shouldn't have to move residences 10 times.
Okay, that's all I've got and I'm not sure I'm convinced yet that it's okay to be in my 30's. Even Mac said the other day that he doesn't want me to turn 30. He then followed up with, "I just like you better in your 20's." Me too, buddy, me too.
Okay, okay, I just read over what I wrote and it does sound pathetically depressing. Looking on the bright side, I really am just happy to be alive and well and to have a wonderful husband and four darling kids to share my life with. I suppose I need to remember that life is a gift and one to be enjoyed and grow from and not necessarily to just count the passing years. While the sound of 30 years is slightly frightening, the fact that I've made it happily along this far is encouraging. So here's to being a better person . . . all 30 years of me! Happy Birthday ME, hope your day is great.